Why. Why Choose to Follow?

My coworker and I were talking after class last week, and he asked me a question that was harder than I thought to put into words.  He asked me, "Why."  Why do I choose to follow Christ.  Have you ever tried to put something like that into actual words?

How do you begin to even describe what it's like to live every day in relationship with God.  Not merely following rules and regulations as "fire insurance", but walking WITH God.  How do you put into words the peace, the assurance, the companionship, the confidence and the direction that brings to your life?  That's like someone asking me, "Why?  Why do you love your husband?  Why do you want to honour, and serve and do life with Nick?"  My immediate answer is how could I not!?

I could sit here and list all the tiny attributes and characteristics and things that make me so in love with Nick or so in love with God, but that makes it seem so categorizable (it's a word now).  Do I love Nick because he stays up late to make me a sandwich for work the next day when he knows I need to be up at 4:30am?  Do I love Nick because of his sweet, tender and gentle spirit/heart?  Do I love Nick because of all the ways he shows love to me on a daily basis?  Do I love Nick for his personality, quirks and dreams?  Yes, yes, yes, and yes!  But it's so much MORE than that.  Nick is my husband, my lover, my companion, my strength, my best friend, my co-adventurer, my back-up, always in my court, always supporting me, always encouraging me, always there.  Do you know what it's like to just have someone like that THERE?

That is Jesus.  THAT is why I could not, would not, ever choose to do life without Him.  Do I love Him because He died for me when He didn't have to?  Do I love Him because I know He has a plan for my life and wishes good things for me?  Do I love Him because He is there in all the little blessings from only 4 red lights on the way to work this morning when I was running late to a timely song on the radio?  Do I love Him because of Who He is and because He first loved me? Yes, yes, yes and yes!  But it's so much MORE than that.  Jesus is my Saviour, my Giver of hope, my Giver of purpose, my true Best Friend, my constant Companion, my strength, always in my court, always wanting the best for me, always directing me when I stray, always listening, always ready, always THERE.

So my first answer is truly my final answer - how could I NOT want to do life with Him?  It's not just about a "reward in the sky one day".  It's about the here.  It's about the now.  The world is messy.  It is unfair.  It is often downright mean.  Why would anyone want to take on the world alone when they could have a Companion like that?  And I have been blessed with two.  One is only human, but the other is my God.

Mexico 2013

This is where God is.  In the present.  I AM - His very name....  It's not the gifts that fulfill, but the holiness of the space.  The God in it....  This is supreme gift, time, God Himself framed in moment.  ...and time is only of the essence, because time is the essence of God, I AM.  

This I need to consecrate:  time.

Ann Voskamp - One Thousand Gifts

On our vacation, I started rereading a life-changing book that I received for Christmas a couple of years ago.  It is a book that follows a woman's journey of learning how to live a life of continual thanks and awareness of the presence of God.  It is the type of book that is easy to read when you are immersed in turquoise waters, white sands, and warm breezes.  When salt curls your hair, fish eat bananas out of your hands, and you stay up til 5:00am just because.  When you stroll through colourful markets, star gaze on the beach, and chase sand out of your mouth while wrapped in a blanket against the ocean breeze.  The words come easy surrounded by endless food, recreation and napping opportunities.  The words come easy when you have nothing but an abundance of Time.

However, it is in the returning home that the words dig a little deeper.  It is when the clock starts to count again, the rain clouds over the sky, and you take your phone off of airplane mode that the real challenge begins.  Coming home was little like being hit in the face with a brick (literally, if you consider I just had all four of my wisdom teeth out without any sedation).  It is when you open your account to 114 waiting email messages, when you are asked to add just another 10 hours to your already 65-70 hour work week, and when you feel like if one more person asks you to do one more thing you may just scream.  THAT is precisely when Time most needs to be consecrated.  

It is in the real life.  In the busy.  In the hectic.  In the mundane, and the stressful and the ordinary that Time is the most easy to lose.  And it is in the here and in the now that I am most determined to not lose it.  Nick and I are entering a season in life where we cannot slow down our surroundings, but we can slow down our hearts.  It is now, more than ever, that we need to live in EACH moment, fully aware of its being a gift from God, and fully aware of the God that takes us through every second of every day.  The hands on the clock do not offer us a racing partner.  They offer us 86,400 moments in a day to experience living life fully, where ever we are, whatever we are doing.

And as the tan peels away, as my mouth throbs from its recent extractions, as Monday morning looms, and as I miss Nick just a little bit more each hour as I have barely seen him all weekend, I sit here in thankfulness.  

I am thankful for a time away and a time of rest.  

I am thankful for great dental plans and lack of swelling.  

I am thankful that the excessive mouth bleeding has ceased.  

I am thankful that I have the means to wash the pile of bloody shirts 

in my closet should I choose to get around to doing so.  

I am thankful for pain so that I can be every more appreciative of when it stops.

I am thankful for dates with my father-in-law.

I am thankful for the chance to play on the worship team this weekend at church.

I am thankful for work that Nick loves to do and direction and purpose in his career.  

I am thankful for a great job to go to every Monday.  

I am thankful for time to write.  

I am thankful for time to reflect.  

I am thankful for life's greater purpose.

I am thankful.

I am thankful.

Modern-Day Manna

Nick and I spent this weekend at my parents, and it was lovely and restful.  We drove up there after work on Friday and got in just after 11:00pm.  We chatted for about an hour, and then Nick and I stayed up way too late after that.  That was okay because we could sleep in on Saturday.  

Unfortunately, our car's brake pads decided to act up on the drive over the mountains, so Nick spend most of Saturday in town at the garage, and then at his grandparents' (who live in town) to say hi, while I stayed out with my parents.  We played a lot of Ticket To Ride, ate good food, read a little and watched some t.v.  

Then the most exciting thing happened right when we were about to leave.  My parents are going on an all-raw diet.  Raw fruit.  Raw vegetables.  Some beans and some nuts.  That's it.  They are planning to be in this for the long haul, so they wanted to remove temptation from the house.  We were MORE than happy to help in this regard!  My parents live waaaayyyy out in the woods in a little town that is nothing more than a gas station and a Coop.  As a result, when they go to town, they really stock up on groceries. They had a huge deep freeze FULL of food and a floor-to-ceiling-pantry as well.  

Dakota was very interested in having all this food be placed at his level:

Emptying the deep freeze.

This was even more exciting for us since things have been so tight lately.  We were planning on living on less than $40 a week for the next month for groceries.  And this week was only going to be $28 because we bought Subway on our trip up there.

We feel so very blessed, even right down to the minute details.  For example, my mom reached into the freezer and pulled out a couple jars of un-pasterized honey.  (Oh, I forgot to mention, 90% this food is organic!!  A-MAZ-ING.)  She asked me if I wanted some honey or if we already had some at home.  Only a week ago, Nick and I were in the grocery store aisle, and we stood there and chose between honey and peanut butter.  We opted for the latter as it would stretch more.  So God even gave us the honey that we put back on the shelf.

On TOP of all this, Nick's grandparents sent him back with a box full of canned peaches, pears, cherries, syrup and a bag of pistachios!  Oh, and some canned sauerkraut, too!

We didn't even know what was in all those boxes until we got home, as I was packing up other stuff while my mom emptied her kitchen.  We found cereals, soups, pancake mix, noodles, pizzas, CHICKEN WINGS, a black forest ham!, boxes of M&M's Chinese dinners, all sorts of dressings and condiments, chicken breasts/thighs, steaks, liver, cheese, juice, bags and bags of french fries, cookies, home-made breakfast bars, sausages, tons of bagels, bread and buns, pork, hamburgers, and even little containers of left-over turkey for sandwiches, among other things!  When we finally got home and unloaded everything, this is what it looked like!

The brown paper packages on the floor, under the chair on the lower-left corner are all STEAK!

The big one in the right-hand corner below is a roast that we already had, but every single wrapped package on the top shelf below is an organic steak!  We had maybe 6 of these beforehand that we were saving/rationing in our freezer, but now they have a LOT of company!

Our happy pantry.

Go figure, with all that food, by the time we unpacked and put everything away, we just ended up having a huge salad for dinner.  With chicken and cheese though, which was a bonus!

I knew God was teaching me to trust Him this Spring.  I knew He would provide, even if I didn't like what that may look like.  (Sometimes God doesn't follow "my" totally awesome plans/ideas and provides in ways that I would maybe not have chosen).  However, I NEVER expected hundreds and hundreds of dollars of free groceries to end up sitting on my kitchen table.  I guess maybe His ways are better sometimes ;)  So THANK YOU mom, dad, grandma, grandpa and Jesus!  I am SO, SO happy to have a break from Kraft Dinner and Mr. Noodle.  If I had to do one more week eating that, my insides may have rotted out of my body!

DIY Laundry Soap

I have a lot of blog catching up to do over this past week.  However, I'll start with a recent project Nick and I worked on: Do-It-Yourself laundry detergent.  (I'm thrifty, but I have to say, this pushed it to a new level for me!).  This post will be pretty similar to the one that gave me the inspiration in the first place, which can be found HERE.  (She also has a link back to the main website where she got the idea from).

I was super thankful that there was a picture posted of the supplies as it made it MUCH easier to locate in the store.  All that you need is:

1.  1/2 cup of Borax;
2.  1/2 cup of Arm & Hammer Washing Soda; and
3.  one Sunlight Bar.

I was doubtful when they said it would all come to around $15, but surprisingly, it was even less, with the Sunlight bars being a package of 2 for $1.99.  (Sunlight bars are what you will run out of the fastest).

It is very easy to make and took only about 30 minutes.  (It is hard to know exactly as we were making dinner at the same time).

STEP 1.  Shred one Sunlight bar with a cheese grater.  Nick informs me that the bars are pretty soft, and it's about as easy as shredding cheese.

STEP 2.  Add 6 cups of water to a large stock pot and put in shredded Sunlight bar.  Stir on a medium heat until the shredded soap dissolves into the water, and looks like the photo below:

STEP 3.  Add 1/2 cup of Borax and 1/2 cup of washing soda to the pot and stir until it also dissolves.  It will start to thicken as well.

STEP 4.  Have four cups of boiling water ready in your kettle (you can put the kettle on during steps 2 and 3 above).  When that boils, pour into a large bucket (2 gallons minimum).  We only had ice-cream buckets, so we just grabbed two of those and treated them like one big pot, pouring everything evenly between them.

STEP 5.  Add all your soap mixture from your big pot on the stove into the large bucket containing the 4 cups of boiling water (or, in our case, into the two smaller buckets where we split everything evenly).

STEP 6.  Water it down even further by pouring an additional gallon (4 litres) of cold water + 6 more cups of cold water and stir.

STEP 7.  Leave for 24 hours and it will turn into a gel which you are ready to use:

24 hours later.  It's hard to describe the texture.  It's "gloopy".  The hole in it is from our first 2 loads of laundry.

In quick summary (in case I confused you), it goes:

6 cups of cold water in pot on stove.  Turn to medium heat.  Add all three ingredients slowly and dissolve.  Grab a big bucket and put 4 cups boiling water in the bottom of it.  Then pour in your soap mixture.  Then top it off with 1 gallon + 6 cups of cold water and stir gently.  Leave sit.


You only need 1/2 cup of the finished gel mixture per laundry load (we pack our washers, too, so it can handle a BIG load).  This works in hot or cold water washes (we tested it).  Just put the gel in the bottom first and let it swish around so that it gets a head start dissolving in the water before you dump a bunch of dirty clothing on top of it. As far as storing it goes, we don't have lids for our ice-cream buckets, so we're just letting it sit out in the open.  Apparently, this is totally fine (we have no young children or pets that will be tempted to eat it, albeit).

Now, I haven't tested this yet, as I JUST made it, but the blog that I got this idea from (see link at top of post), states that this one batch will do about 64 loads of laundry. This sounds about right.

EDITED to say:  I HAVE tested it now, and it will evaporate over time if you don't put a lid on it.  

I "think" I probably have at least 8 more "1/2 cups" of Borax and washing soda in those boxes, which together only cost about $10-$12.  So, if I get 9 batches (rough estimate) of laundry soap out of them, then $12 divided by 9 = $1.33 per batch.  Bump that up to $2.33 as the Sunlight bars are $1.00 each.  So for $2.33 I can do 64 loads of laundry.  Not bad at all!  And my clothes smell great!

EDITED to say:  Now that I have been using this a while, I have two words of caution to add.  1.  If you absolutely PACK your washers like we do, you may find a bit of residue left on pure black clothing items.  I just grab a damp towel and wipe it off before wearing it when this happens.  I'm sure it's probably avoidable if you don't overload your machines ;)   

2.  Because there is no bleach in this, you may find your whites don't come out as white as they used to.  A friend told me that some people put Oxy Clean in it to help with this.  I haven't tried this, but it's worth looking into if you are concerned.  I have a whitening bar of soap that I just scrub on the arm pits and collars of white shirts before throwing them in the wash, and that seems to do the trick.  It's probably better for your clothes overall, but a pain when you have a lot of whites :)

BONUS:  I did a little brief research.  Don't hold me to this as I didn't spend a ton of time on it, but it seems that making your own laundry detergent using these ingredients is a lot better for you/the environment, as they seem to have a lot less of the harsh chemicals found in pre-made, store-bought stuff.

We Are Weird

Nick and are weird... like, really weird.  We can have the same, "What would you do if aliens attacked RIGHT NOW and there was a massive EMP?" conversation every time we drive through the mountains.  (You really have to take the contour of the road and the speed at which you are traveling into consideration if your car were to suddenly die from a world-wide EMP). And it can last for up to an hour each time.  Or, how would you survive if..."fill in very unlikely, and highly random scenario".  I think we would write interesting books.  I believe we had a 2 hour phone conversation about being stranded in the desert, at about 2:00a.m. in the morning, while we were "not quite dating yet", long-distance and both had school in the morning. 

It started again last night, much too late.

Nick:  It's really cold.  We should turn on the heat.

Laura:  No way!  We accidentally left it on for half a week and wasted all that energy and have to make up for it (I am also ridiculous in other ways, as well).  Besides, who wants to sleep in a warm, stuffy room.  That would be gross.

Nick:  Well, we should get more blankets then.

Laura:  Okay!  Get them all!

Much shuffling around and piling of blankets before we both dive freezing cold into the middle of them.

Laura:  So... do you think we could survive like this in 20 below?

Nick:  Maybe.

Laura:  What about 40 below?

Nick:  Well, you would have to create some sort of breathing tunnel...

 I will spare you the rest of the very long, very late conversation.  Just to give you an idea of how seriously we take these conversations, one part of our discussion went like this:

Laura:  We are NEVER going to get to sleep like this.

Nick:  No, I don't think you would sleep.  You would be better to stay awake until morning.

Laura:  No, Nick, I mean RIGHT NOW, in real life.  We need to go to sleep!

Nick:  Oh.. haha.

No, we did not go to sleep.  Yes, the discussion continued on for about 40 minutes in total, with experimental breathing tunnels, trying back to front vs. front to front cuddling to see which way you could stay the warmest (no, that is not code for anything), discussions on snow density in various parts of the country, and finally calling it quits and going to sleep!   

No wonder we have no friends... kidding :)  Though, we are by far the "nerdiest" of all our friends.